Unwell Season 3/Episode 4 - The Imminent Frost
by Bilal Dardai
Meteorological differences.
Layers within Layers.
Who does this place belong to?
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Content Advisories for this episode can be found here.
Support Unwell and HartLife NFP on Patreon at www.patreon.com/hartlifenfp
This episode features: Joshua K. Harris as Rudy, Krista D'Agostino as Hazel, Pat King as Chester, and Kim Fukawa as Joanne.
Written by Bilal Dardai, sound design by Sarah D. Espinoza, directed by Jeffrey Nils Gardner, theme music composed by Stephen Poon, Delphic hymn composed by John Szymanski and performed by Betsey Palmer, John Szymanski, Jeffrey Nils Gardner, Michael Turrentine, Mel Ruder and Sydney Penny, recording engineer Mel Ruder, associate producer TH Ponders, Theme performed by Stephen Poon, Lauren Kelly, Gunnar Jebsen, Travis Elfers, Mel Ruder, and Betsey Palmer, Unwell lead sound designer Eli Hamada McIlveen, Executive Producers Eleanor Hyde and Jeffrey Nils Gardner, by HartLife NFP.
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EXTERIOR, EVENING. A CHILL WIND.
THE SOUND OF THE WHEELS ON AN
OLDER SEDAN PULLING UP ON A GRAVEL
DRIVEWAY COVERED IN AN INCH OF
SNOW. THE CAR IDLES FOR A MOMENT
AND THEN STOPS. A DRIVER AND
PASSENGER SIDE DOOR OPEN. HAZEL
AND RUDY STEP OUT, IN THE MIDDLE
OF CONVERSATION. THE DOORS CLOSE.
HAZEL: ...I’d say three inches at most.
RUDY: You sound certain.
HAZEL: I’m only telling you what I know from
Experience. This is a flurry, that’s all.
Three inches, tops.
RUDY: Well, you keep the almanacs, so I’d say
you’re the expert. Should we go in?
HAZEL: No. No. Let’s wait for Chester. He’ll pout
if he’s not here for your first time inside.
(BEAT.) The Great Blizzard of ‘78. Dayton
got hit with a foot. Parts of Michigan got
walloped . Muskegon, I heard, got
50-something inches over two days . I was a
little girl at the time, I got so excited
when I heard how bad it was, because we’d
never had a snow day home from school
before, and surely, ha-ha, surely this was
it...! (BEAT.) Four inches. Four, Rudy. No
snow day for little Hazel. But that’s Mt.
Absalom for you! Who can complain? Just
enough summer for the swimming pool, just
enough winter for the sled.
RUDY: Great thing to put on a brochure.
HAZEL: Three inches. And it probably won’t stick.
RUDY: Wonder if that has something to do with your
sewer system.
HAZEL: What?
ANOTHER CAR PULLS UP, STOPS, TURNS
OFF. THE DOOR OPENS AND CHESTER
COMES OUT, STEPPING OVER TO RUDY
AND HAZEL.
CHESTER: Sorry, I’m late, I know, sorry. All this
snow, right? Can’t be too careful driving.
Look at it all! I bet we get eight or nine
inches tonight. Have you been here long?
HAZEL: A minute or two.
CHESTER: And you waited? You didn’t have to do that.
HAZEL: I know. I’m very generous. Shall we?
CHESTER: Oh, of course. Get out of this avalanche.
SHOES WALKING ON GRAVEL AND SNOW.
AN ODD, LOW DRONING SOUND,
MUFFLED, COMING CLOSER.
HAZEL: Rudy, allow me to--
CHESTER: --welcome to the August Hall of the Delphic
Order!
A LARGE WOODEN DOOR OPENS. THE
ODD, LOW DRONING SOUND CAN NOW BE
HEARD CLEARLY AS A CHOIR SINGING
AN EERIE SCALE OF NOTES. THIS
LASTS FOR SEVERAL SECONDS. THE
DOOR CLOSES. THE DRONING CHOIR
CUTS OFF.
JOANNE: Good! Wonderful, everyone. Great warmup.
Exceptional tone, solid breath control.
HAZEL: (CLAPPING HER HANDS) Absolutely agree!
JOANNE: (WARMLY) Hazel! Good evening! (TO THE ROOM)
Coats and boots, people! On the road in five
minutes.
HAZEL: The carolers sound lovely, Joanne. Great job
getting them in shape for the season.
JOANNE: Thank you. They’ve worked hard. This is...?
CHESTER: This is Dr. Rudolfus Peltham.
RUDY: Rudy, please.
CHESTER: The astronomer who’s been restoring the
observatory?
JOANNE: Oh, of course. I heard about your accident.
My husband Alden told me you were
touch-and-go for a minute there.
RUDY: Alden. Alden. He’s the one who...
HAZEL: Drove you to the ER.
RUDY: Yes. Joanne? Joanne. Please do pass along
my thanks. I don’t think I said it properly
at the time. Let him know, whatever he
needs, I owe him. (In a London accent,
briefly.) “Pint of beer or a pint of blood,”
as my friend Andrew used to say.
JOANNE: My, you’re a charmer. I like this one,
Hazel.
HAZEL: Glad to hear it. You see--
CHESTER: --Rudy is here tonight to be initiated into
the Delphic Order.
JOANNE: Is that right? What wonderful news. Hazel, I
don’t recall the last time we initiated a
new member who wasn’t already family.
HAZEL: Neither do I, come to think of it. It’s very
rare.
JOANNE: Hazel tells us you’re doing wonderful things
at the observatory.
RUDY: I do my best. Please let me say that I am
both honored and thrilled to have been
extended an invitation.
JOANNE: Such a gentleman. Don’t get many of those
around here, do we.
HAZEL: Isn’t that the God’s honest truth. Chester,
maybe you should take notes.
JOANNE: (TO THE ROOM) All right, folks! Out to the
vans! Let’s spread some holiday cheer. It’s
cold out there, so remember to keep your
lips limber.
THE SOUND OF SEVERAL PEOPLE
HUMMING AN EERIE SCALE AS THEY
SHUFFLE OUT THROUGH AN OPENING
DOOR, WHICH CLOSES BEHIND THEM.
CHESTER: (CALLING AS THEY GO) Drive carefully! Looks
like ten to twelve inches out there.
BRIEF SILENCE. A CRACKLING FIRE
CAN BE HEARD IN THE ROOM.
RUDY: Everyone here seems very friendly. And on
pitch! What do you call this building again?
CHESTER: The August Hall.
RUDY: August the month or august the adjective?
CHESTER: The...adjective. Like...distinguished.
RUDY: I didn’t want to assume. You know how
there’s an October Palace in Kyiv?
Incredible acoustics. Anyway. I like your
space. That’s all I’m saying. The central
hearth is a great touch. Makes the whole
room feel like a Viking hall. Viking in a
good way. The warmth and camaraderie, not
the raiding and pillaging.
HAZEL: Ahem. Rudy.
RUDY: Sorry. New experiences make me chatty.
HAZEL: It’s very endearing. Have a seat.
CHAIRS ARE PULLED TOGETHER AND SAT
UPON.
RUDY: Eager to learn more, is all.
HAZEL: Yes. (BEAT.) Why is that?
RUDY: Hm?
HAZEL: Now that you’re here, now that you’re seeing
our inner workings, I need you to be
forthright with me. Why do you wish to join
the Delphic Order?
CHESTER: Hazel, you’re being--
HAZEL: --shush.
CHESTER: Oh no. Don’t you shush me. We’re not in your
library. I have as much right to speak in
here as you do.
HAZEL: Dr. Peltham, I don’t know what expectations
you had when you asked to learn more about
us. Perhaps you thought we were just another
social club like others in the Midwest. Elks
or Moose or another large, dumb hooved
animal. We are not that.
RUDY: No, I’d say that was crystal clear.
HAZEL: Then you understand how much influence we
wield in Mt. Absalom.
RUDY: Sure do.
HAZEL: And how long we have wielded it.
RUDY: Not the exact timeframe, but I get that it’s
been a stretch, sure.
HAZEL: So you can understand why I’d be suspicious.
Especially knowing how fond you are of Dot
Harper.
RUDY: Because it was never the town that wanted
Fenwood House, was it. Nah, it was you
bunch. The Delphic Order. Mayor Lopez was
reading his lines, while you were pulling
his strings.
CHESTER: In a manner of--
RUDY: --wait, no, mixed my metaphors there. He
was, he was doing his dance , while you
were--
HAZEL: --so in spite of our...well, in spite of
Chester’s failed attempt to procure Fenwood.
You’d still ask to join the Order.
RUDY: I would.
HAZEL: Why.
RUDY: I see what the confusion is, here. Allow me
to clarify. When you do what I do...and I
don’t mean astronomy in general, I mean
astronomy the way I do astronomy . Sometimes
you’re being asked to set up an office at a
prestige university and deliver a few hours
of lectures per semester, but other times
you’re sneaking into a bell tower with a
penlight and a notepad so you can
chicken-scratch a star chart before the
guard comes back around. You feel me? And
then there are other times. Times when, say,
you want to do a six-month study of the sky
above Caltabellota Sicily, and the best way
to make sure nobody bothers you is to get
good and copasetic with the province mayor
to make sure he’s keeping certain criminal
elements in line.
CHESTER: I’m sorry, are you comparing the Delphic
Order to the Mafia?
RUDY: No. When did I say he was Mafia? Because
he’s from Sicily he’s automatically Mafia?
That’s racist, Chester.
CHESTER: I--I didn’t mean--wait, is it?
RUDY: He wasn’t Mafia. He was just corrupt. That’s
not what I’m calling you. And they prefer
Cosa Nostra .
HAZEL: I understand you, Rudy. You need access to
our resources and our knowledge.
RUDY: Exactly that. So no matter how upset I still
am over what you tried to do to Dot, I also
know I need you if I want to do my research.
You make peace with the local power
structure and the power structure takes care
of you. Like, say, when you need help
obtaining a custom-built telescope lens. Or
when you suffer a severe concussion in a
secluded observatory.
A LENGTHY PAUSE.
CHESTER: ...I don’t think that’s racist.
HAZEL: Rudy.
RUDY: Yes, Hazel.
HAZEL: I’m satisfied.
RUDY: That’s a relief. So I’m in, then?
HAZEL: Let’s not call it “in,” just yet. Let’s
say you get to walk through another door.
RUDY: Okay.
HAZEL: (STANDING) Follow me, please.
SOUND OF A DOOR IN A NEARBY WALL
BEING UNLOCKED.
RUDY: Oh. You meant another door literally.
CHESTER: I’m coming too.
HAZEL: I never said you couldn’t.
CHESTER: Even if you had.
HAZEL: Now’s not the time, Chester. Come if you’re
coming.
THREE SETS OF FOOTSTEPS WALK THROUGH A DOOR, DOWN A HALLWAY, AND INTO AN ELEVATOR
RUDY: (TO HIMSELF) Certainly are a lot of creepy
basements in this town.
CHESTER: I for one find a great deal of comfort and
security in our basement. It used to be a
bomb shelter, you see. When the Delphics
took it over, we built up from it to
establish the August Hall.
RUDY: Why was there a bomb shelter here?
CHESTER: A previous Mayor, he built it.
RUDY: Death Ray Mayor?
CHESTER: Yes. You...probably have a complete picture
by now.
RUDY: Hazel, where are we going?
HAZEL: The library.
RUDY: The library? Oof, I’m lost. I thought that
was miles from here. You really built a
tunnel that goes that far?
HAZEL: I don’t mean that library.
RUDY: Ah yes. Got it. The special collection.
HAZEL: How does everybody know about that?
RUDY: Abbie told me.
HAZEL: And how does Abbie know about that?
RUDY: I’m not sure they did. I think they just
went on a hunch that all libraries have a
special collection. Which is true, no?
HAZEL: Perhaps. But “special” is a very broad term,
Rudy. There’s the public collection, there’s
the special collection, and then there’s
what I keep down here.
SOUND OF ANOTHER DOOR UNLOCKING
AND OPENING.
HAZEL: You’ll find that everything about Mt.
Absalom has levels. And the Delphic Order
has the most intricate levels of all.
THE INTERIOR OF HAZEL’S CHAMBERS.
A SOUNDPROOF ROOM WITH CONCRETE
WALLS A FOOT THICK, AND THE LOW
HUM OF A HIGH-END CLIMATE CONTROL
AND VENTILATION SYSTEM.
RUDY: (LOW WHISTLE) This your office?
HAZEL: As I told you: levels. In this hall, we are
a community group. At the town hall, we
are a political group. Beneath both of
those, however, we are a spiritual group,
and we oversee the greater mysteries of Mt.
Absalom. I would not call this my office,
Rudy. This is a chamber.
RUDY: Soundproof?
HAZEL: A hundred percent.
RUDY: For telling secrets?
HAZEL: For telling some of them.
RUDY: Can I just say: This is exactly what I hoped
it would be. Soundproof underground chamber?
Dark, ominous declarations of power? Those
little, what are they, dioramas of the town?
What’s in this bottle?
HAZEL: Don’t touch that. Have a seat, Rudy.
RUDY: Please tell me you’re going to read
something from the big book over there.
HAZEL: I am, in fact.
RUDY: Then do not let me stop you.
A LARGE BOOK BEING OPENED ON A
WOODEN LECTERN. A LAMP BEING
CLICKED ON.
HAZEL: I’m going to read this to you the way it was
read to me. As all prospective initiates in
the Delphic Order have had it read to
them. Do you agree to listen to the story I
tell?
RUDY: (AFTER A MOMENT) Oh! Yes. I do.
HAZEL: Moreso than listen: Do you agree to hear the
story I tell?
RUDY: I do.
HAZEL: Moreso than hear: Do you agree to trust the
story I tell?
RUDY: Yes.
HAZEL: And moreso than listening, hearing, or
trusting: Do you agree not to repeat the
story I tell to any outside of the Order?
RUDY: I agree to that.
HAZEL: Good. Then I may share with you the story of
the Delphic Order.
CHESTER: (CLEARS HIS THROAT) Hrrmhmmm.
HAZEL: Don’t interrupt, Chester.
CHESTER: I apologize, Hazel, I do, but...are you
going to play the music?
HAZEL: Oh. Oh, no I wasn’t planning on it. I’ve
been thinking lately that it’s a bit much.
CHESTER: I don’t know that I’d say that.
HAZEL: Hm.
RUDY: I would very much like to hear this with the
music.
HAZEL: Well. All right then.
SOUND OF A DRAWER OPENING, A
CASSETTE TAPE BEING PLACED INTO A
PLAYER, AND A BUTTON BEING
PRESSED. AN AMBIENT UNDERSCORE,
NOT OVERLY EERIE BUT DOES HELP SET
A CERTAIN MOOD. PERHAPS IT IS
PLAYED IN THE STYLE OF MID-1980S
SYNTHWAVE.
HAZEL: As all citizens of Mt. Absalom know, our
settlement was established by the pioneers,
who were led to this valley by the lonesome
reverend Silas Lodge. Working hand-in-hand,
they accepted and nourished the gifts of the
rich Earth. They were rewarded with the
bounty of this hale and verdant land, and in
their satisfaction saw fit to remain and to
prosper. Even after the reverend died, we
sought to maintain his principles of
generosity, invitation, and fellowship that
had built the town in the first place, and
what was once a mere camp became a thriving
township.
But let me tell you now what the Delphic
Order knows of Mt. Absalom.
For even as the folk of Mt. Absalom sowed
the land and reaped its harvest, the keen
HAZEL (CONT): eyes of our founders observed that the land
was unique for its soil and for the position
it seemed to hold in the vastness of
creation. Mt. Absalom was not only a land of
life, you see. Mt. Absalom was a land beyond
life.
RUDY: Ghosts. You’re talking about--
HAZEL: --sh.
RUDY: Sorry.
HAZEL: The roads and structures of Mt. Absalom had
revealed themselves to be the dominion of
unquelled souls. At first the founders
were concerned what this might mean for the
souls of the living, but they soon
recognized that no valley of the damned
would also provide such plenty. Mt. Absalom
was not a settlement that strayed close to
hell, no. It was a settlement that touched
the veil of the heavens. And the founders
agreed that we could coexist, and protect
the spirits by whatever means possible.
Except for one.
For the reverend Silas Lodge did not see the
presence of the spirits as an extension of
our good fortune, but as a harbinger of
doom. Driven to madness, Lodge anointed
himself the Revelator, and rebelled against
the people to whom he had once provided
relief. Blasphemy and chaos followed,
abetted by citizens who had fallen under his
sway. To resist the violence of the formerly
right reverend, the founders created the
Delphic Order, and then, aided by ancient
HAZEL (CONT): ritual and the grace of this land, they cast
The Revelator beyond the borders of Mt.
Absalom, never to return. There in the
wilderness did he and his twisted gospel
perish.
But Mt. Absalom, as I told you, is a
dominion of unquelled souls. The anger of
Silas Lodge could not be denied by mere
death. The forests burned with his rage, and
the waters echoed with his condemnation. For
generations since, the Delphic Order alone
have reinforced the barriers that keep his
uneasy specter at bay. The Delphic Order
alone provides vigilance.
In Mt. Absalom all good things may grow in
light and warmth. Yet all things that grow
in the summer are fearful at the return of
winter. Therefore we, the Delphic Order,
commit ourselves to being the gardener at
the gate, ever watchful of the imminent
frost.
THE MUSIC IS TURNED OFF.
RUDY: The eminent frost?
HAZEL: Imminent. “Soon to arrive.”
RUDY: Can I see the book?
HAZEL: No. For now you accept that I hold the
knowledge. Consider me the well from which
you may draw that knowledge.
RUDY: So I can ask you anything?
HAZEL: You may ask. But I may not always answer.
RUDY: Fair. (BEAT) It’s a lot.
HAZEL: I know. I hope it helps you to understand,
Rudy, how much trust we have decided to
place in you, and how seriously we hold you
to your oaths. Wouldn’t you agree, Chester?
CHESTER: Hm. (BEAT) You know, Hazel, I think you were
right. The music was a bit much.
HAZEL: What?
CHESTER: Probably should’ve gone with your gut.
HAZEL: Now just you wait a minute.
CHESTER: You know what else is a bit much? You
changing the story the way you did.
HAZEL: Changing the story? I didn’t--
CHESTER: --you thought I wouldn’t notice.
HAZEL: Notice what?
CHESTER: You seem to forget that my grandfather used
to do what you’re doing right now. That
these chambers used to be his chambers.
HAZEL: I haven’t forgotten anything of the kind. I
both respect and honor the time that Arthur
Warren spent serving in this role.
CHESTER: Then perhaps you didn’t imagine that I’ve
heard this story before. Several times. From
him.
HAZEL: ...what? He...he brought you into...
CHESTER: No, not in here. But sometimes my mom would
ask him to put me to bed. And I’d ask Grampa
Art for a story. And this was the only story
he really knew. So I heard it a bunch.
RUDY: Your grandfather told you that as a bedtime
story?
CHESTER: Yeah, look, it was a different time. And he
was a...man of it.
HAZEL: That was unwise.
CHESTER: Maybe, but he figured I’d hear it
eventually. It’s a Warren family birthright,
after all. (BEAT) You said: “The anger of
Silas Lodge could not be denied by mere
death. The forests burned with his rage and
the waters echoed with his condemnation.”
HAZEL: I did...
CHESTER: That’s not what’s written there, is it,
Hazel. (BEAT) Is it. Hazel.
HAZEL: Chester...
CHESTER: “The disappointment of Silas Lodge could not
be denied by mere death. The forests burned
with his sorrow and the waters echoed with
his lamentation .” (BEAT) Is that a little
closer , Hazel? Is that, in fact, exactly
what’s written there?
HAZEL: ...yes.
RUDY: Those do mean different things.
CHESTER: So you decided to do a little revision on
it because...?
HAZEL: (DEFENSIVELY) Because it’s obviously
incorrect!
CHESTER: Incorrect. You’re calling one of our
foundational texts, a text that you are in
charge of, incorrect.
HAZEL: Just those three words! I’ve read them so
many times and they’ve never once made
sense. Sorrow? Disappointment? The forests
around Mt. Absalom burned , Chester! That’s
clearly the Revelator’s rage. I just, I just
assumed that the words in the book were
chosen because of the sensibility of the
time when the book was written! Like, like
Jane Austen or--
CHESTER: --Jane. Austen.
HAZEL: You know what I mean.
CHESTER: I really don’t, Hazel. What I do know is
that it sounds more to me like you’ve
decided you not only keep and read the words
of the Delphic Order’s sacred books, but
that you get to interpret them according to
your own agenda. (BEAT) How dare you.
HAZEL: How...dare... I?
RUDY: Hi, listen: Should I maybe step outside?
This all seems a little above my pay grade.
HAZEL: Yes, Rudy, perhaps you should--
CHESTER: --I disagree, I think Rudy needs to see
this. I think Rudy should be able to know
what he’s signed up for. Eyes wide open.
HAZEL: Rudy is a new --
CHESTER: --do you know, Rudy, when I told Hazel
that I thought you might be exactly the sort
of person we should invite into the Delphic
Order, do you know what she said to me?
RUDY: No, what?
CHESTER: “Excellent idea, Chester. In fact, I’d like
to handle him personally.”
HAZEL: Because you’re a guest in our town, and it’s
only right that the head of our Order--
CHESTER: --mislead you about the Order’s foundation
story?
HAZEL: No!
CHESTER: Can you imagine, Rudy, if I hadn’t been here
to correct the record?
RUDY: Hazel. You gotta admit. You asked me to
trust the story you were telling me and then
you didn’t tell me the story the way it was
written. Even for an group that keeps a lot
of secrets, this is pretty shady.
HAZEL: ...I apologize. This shouldn’t be how any
new member is brought into the Order.
RUDY: I forgive you. I assume it’s very stressful
that the Revelator is walking among us.
HAZEL: You...know about that?
RUDY: I’ve met him.
HAZEL: When was this?
CHESTER: He came to Fenwood for Thanksgiving.
CHESTER: Wait what. What? WHAT. He did WHAT?
RUDY: He and Dot had a tense sort of...thing. Not
the most dramatic Thanksgiving dinner I’ve
been to, but it was up there.
CHESTER: Twice then. He’s growing bolder, Hazel.
RUDY: You’ve met him too?
CHESTER: He appeared at Dot’s Halloween party.
RUDY: In costume?
CHESTER: No. Just as himself.
RUDY: I suppose that’s scary enough.
CHESTER: Yes. It was.
HAZEL: Did he say anything we should know?
RUDY: There was a lot of talk about boundaries and
rituals that I didn’t fully understand. He
did say one thing I’d never heard before:
That the One Who Blooms wanted to meet with
Dot.
HAZEL: The One Who Blooms? Are you sure you heard
that correctly?
RUDY: Positive.
CHESTER: Not “The One in the Night.”
RUDY: No. “Blooms.” Why, does it mean something to
you?
HAZEL: It doesn’t. That’s what worries me. “The One
Who Blooms.”
CHESTER: Why didn’t you tell us this before?
RUDY: I didn’t know your relationship with him
before. Now I do. You see how this works,
Chester? We learn from each other.
HAZEL: “The One Who Blooms.” (BEAT) Chester, I’m
going to need to do some more research. It’s
probably going to take up quite a bit of my
time. Would you please make sure Rudy has
what he needs to finish his orientation?
CHESTER: Happy to.
HAZEL: What time is it. Oh my goodness. We should
head back upstairs. No. Actually. The two of
you head upstairs, I’m going to look through
a few things down here first. I’ll join you
shortly.
RUDY: Is there...like, is there paperwork?
CHESTER: There’s a book upstairs. You’ll sign it.
I’ll take care of it.
HAZEL: Yes. Thank you Chester. Please do. Close the
door behind you, please.
CHAIRS BEING MOVED, AND CHESTER
EXITS WITH RUDY. HAZEL CAN BE
HEARD MUTTERING ANXIOUSLY TO
HERSELF AS THE DOOR CLOSES. THEY
WALK BACK TO THE STAIRS.
CHESTER: You’re taking this all pretty well. I’d
known I’d be joining the Order since I was
eight, and I still found it overwhelming.
RUDY: You’re forgetting I was raised in a commune.
I’m used to a lot of arbitrary rules and
complicated lore. So: At least that turned
out to be good for something.
CHESTER: I was watching you during the recitation.
You seemed...very affected by it.
RUDY: Hazel’s a good narrator. I bet she’s a hit
with the kids during story hour.
CHESTER: I’m serious, Rudy. When she spoke of the
veil between heaven and earth I saw
a shadow cross over your face.
RUDY: That. Yes. Something about the image
reminded me of my mother.
CHESTER: Your mother?
RUDY: Another time, Chester. All right?
THEY WALK IN SILENCE FOR A MOMENT,
HEADING UP THE STAIRS.
CHESTER: You know what’s under the observatory, don’t
you.
RUDY: We figured it was a church of some kind. On
account of you calling it Chapel Hill.
CHESTER: It wasn’t just a church. It was his church.
Silas’s church. After the founders cast him
out, they removed all trace they could of
him.
RUDY: So you buried the church.
CHESTER: Tearing it down or burning it seemed...
RUDY: Improper.
CHESTER: Right.
RUDY: Hazel said that Silas had followers. What
happened to them?
CHESTER: (AFTER A LONG SILENCE) The gardener’s job is
also to pluck out weeds.
THE DOOR OPENS. THE DISTANT SOUND
OF A PITCH PIPE, AND JOANNE
COUNTING OUT TO THREE. A CHOIR
BEGINS TO SING A SONG THAT’S PART
CHURCH HYMNAL AND PART COLLEGIATE
ALMA MATER AND I HAVE NOT YET
WRITTEN IT BUT IT’S GOOD THAT
WE HAVE A BUDGET FOR THIS SORT OF
THING NOW.
CHOIR: Sing of joy and sing of grace!
Welcome to our warm embrace!
We name you now our kith and kin!
And invite you to our fires within!
Should you ever tire of labor,
The Delphic Order is your neighbor!
Should your hope be at its end,
The Delphic Order is your friend!
Should you be weighed by despair,
CHOIR (CONT): The Delphic Order gives you care!
Feel no sorrow, feel no fear!
The Delphic Order is always here!
Let our hearts show true goodwill!
Let our light shine brighter still!
When you might feel cold and lost,
We’ll protect you from the frost!
DIALOGUE CONTINUES UNDER THE CHOIR
SINGING.
RUDY: So they weren’t going caroling?
CHESTER: No. I’m sorry. Hazel told me not to
tell you.
RUDY: It’s very nice of you to do this.
CHESTER: It should be. But this is the second
time she’s lied to you tonight, and now
it unsettles me that I helped her.
(BEAT) It’s important for you to
remember about Hazel. She’s a good
woman and she holds the best interests
of the Order at heart. But you should
never, ever trust her.
THE CHOIR CONCLUDES AND CHEERS IN
WELCOME.
END. CREDITS ROLL
POST CREDIT SCENE:
WES STANDS NEAR THE WITCH’S ALTAR.
A WINTER WIND BLOWS THROUGH. THERE
IS A DISTANT WOODPECKER SOUND. WES
TAPS THE STONE.
A WOLF HOWLS IN THE DISTANCE.
AFTER A MOMENT, IT IS ANSWERED BY
A YOUNG GIRL, HOWLING BACK. THE
WOLF STOPS, BUT THE WOODPECKER
CONTINUES.
WES: Hello?
JOEY: Hello there.
WES: Joey. I remember you. Spikes’ friend. Are
you supposed to be out here?
JOEY: What, does the Witch’s Altar belong to you
or something?
WES: No, I just mean--
JOEY: --I’m more of a witch than you are. If
you’re not careful I’ll turn you into a,
into a...
WES: Ghost?
JOEY: Ghost? That’s stupid. No, I was gonna say a
worm. And then I was gonna stick you on a
hook and catch a fish with you.
WES: Oh.
JOEY: We already got enough ghosts around these
parts. Right, Wes?
WES: You know who I am?
JOEY: Doy.
WES: You know...what I am?
JOEY: Doy again. I’m not just Spikes’ friend,
y’know. I was Lily’s friend, too, when she
was Spikes’ age. A few other girls before
either of them.
WES: Then you’re like me. A ghost.
JOEY: Me? Like you? You’re like a baby to me. I
should put a bottle in your mouth and sing
you a lullaby. (BEAT) I’ve seen what you do
for Dot. Thanks for doing that. I think Lily
would have died of a broken heart if
something had happened. (BEAT) Do you have
friends, Wes?
WES: I think so. I thought so.
JOEY: You’re wrong. That’s not the way the water
flows. We’re friends to others, and they get
to have us . We don’t get to have them .
WES: That’s...not true.
JOEY: (AN EXASPERATED GRUNT) UGH! Catch up, will
you? I’m not telling you anything true , I’m
just telling you how things are.
WES: That doesn’t--
JOEY: Never mind! It’s like talking to a bag of
marbles! I’m trying to have a grownup
conversation with you and you’re still just
a thirsty sapling.
WES: A conversation about what?
JOEY: About everything ! About Mt. Absalom, and
Fenwood House, and about what happens when
the doors begin to fall off their hinges.
WES: You’re not making any sense!
JOEY: (SUDDENLY VERY CLOSE TO WES) She needs you,
Wes. She still needs you. Soon. Very soon.
Go now. Go.
THE LAST ECHO OF “GO” SKIPS ACROSS THE
ALTAR. THE WOODPECKER CONTINUES.
WES: Oh no.
WES VANISHES.